


not in front of the baby

by izzyasavestheday (stilessexual)



Series: you're not healing wrong [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 15:03:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12323406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stilessexual/pseuds/izzyasavestheday
Summary: “Where were you?”And damn him. Damn Theo straight back to hell because Liam’s voice cracked audibly.“You know what,” Liam cut him off before Theo could begin to explain. “I don’t care. I don’t even fucking care. What do you want? Because that's why you’re here, isn’t it? You want something.”





	not in front of the baby

**Author's Note:**

> seriously unbeta'd and being posted at 3 in the morning - all mistakes are mine.

Scott is gone, Scott Is gone, Scott is _gone_ —

Not gone, like, actually gone. Scott was somewhere in South America –helping Cora and Derek round up omegas, end world hunger, and probably find the cure to cancer while he was at it.

 But it felt like he was gone.

Liam missed Scott the way you missed a lost limb –always, always, always.

The fact that the older members of the pack weren’t around was a constant writhing anxiety wrapped around Liam’s neck. They tried –so hard, but they had their lives, and they deserved to live them. Lydia skyped him every other night, patient and kind, while Stiles never stopped texting him to make sure everything was going smoothly. Malia literally showed up at the weirdest fucking times –two in the morning, at his window, all earnest until it caught up with her and she punched him in the arm before disappearing back into the darkness. Scott was really the only one who ever saw her with any type of regularity anymore.

(And Theo, the fucker, was the black hole that consumed his every thought and action. He disappeared in the aftermath of the events in the hospital. No one has heard from him since, not even Liam. Especially not Liam –Theo, the fucking bane of Liam’s fucking existence, could be dead in ditch somewhere, could be alone and tired and hungry—)

No. Nope. Not doing it. Not going there.  

Anyways.

They cared. Liam knew they cared deeply about him, about the rest of their little ragtag pack, but fuck. _Fuck_. He wished they were still around, especially now, _especially—_

“Liam,” Mason said, not for the first time. “Liam, you with me?”

Especially _now_ , now, when Mason was standing in front of him, holding a sleeping baby. A sleeping werewolf baby. A sleeping werewolf baby whose eyes had flashed red because she was an alpha. Because shit couldn’t just happen at once to Liam, nope, when it rained it fucking poured.

“You have a really beautiful face,” Liam blurted, unthinking, because gazing lovely at his best friend’s gorgeous face was a hell of a lot easier than trying to work out the clusterfuck that was his life.

Mason closed his eyes and sighed heavily.

“Thanks buddy,” he said. “Now what are we gonna do about the baby?”

“I-

Liam buried his head in his hands and groaned low.

“I don’t know?” he mumbled into his hands, “I can’t call Scott or Derek –they’re doing fuck knows what. Malia’s in Australia, I think? Lydia has a really big final at the end of the week. Stiles has been prepping for this huge stimulation. I can’t just—

“Liam, look at me.” Mason tried, gently maneuvering the baby into a more comfortable position. “They’re not here. You’re in charge. What do we do?”

_The sun, the moon, the truth—_

“We figure out who’s able to watch the baby,” Liam exhaled roughly, “set up a schedule so that no one person gets overwhelmed. I’ll call the surrounding packs and see if, fuck, I don’t know. See if something happened. If someone’s missing a freakin’ baby. Meet with Deaton? I’ll meet with Deaton and I’ll see if he has any tips or advice or whatever.”

Mason smile, all serene and shit, and nodded. “Cool.”

“Cool?”

“Yeah, man. We’ll figure it out.”

The baby chose that moment to jerk herself awake and blink at them owlishly.

“She’s cute,” Liam said, reaching forward and letting her grab his finger.  

“What are we calling her?”

The baby was like –fucking adorable, long lashed, with vague grey-blue-navy eyes that most babies had, these cherub cheeks that kind of made Liam’s chest ache and tiny little hands that were now grabbing clumsily at Mason’s earrings.

“Clarke?”

Mason snorted, “Like Clarke Griffin from The Hundred?”

Liam flushed, they’d spent the last couple of weeks binge watching the show. “Yeah? No. Fuck you. She looks like a Clarke.”

“Okay,” Mason grinned down at her, fond already. “Okay, sure. We’ll go with your white ass name. Clarke it is.”

❣

It was going fine, honestly, just so good. Until, you know, it really fucking wasn’t.

They’d come up with a rotating schedule of who spent time with baby Clarke, and if Liam jacked it a bit so he that he was left with the most time with the kid –well, he’s supposed to be the acting alpha, isn’t he? This was his responsibility.

Clarke was his responsibility. They were all his responsibility.

“They’re all dead?”

Deaton nodded gravely, “Seems like our old friend Monroe found the pack and, well, it’s a miracle that the child survived.”

Months, months, _months_ after Monroe came and happened to them, Liam still felt a sickening rush of heat that left him shaking and so fucking angry at the very mention of her name—

“Liam,” Deaton said his name quietly, “Liam, it’s alright.”

He exhaled unsteadily, “Sorry. Sorry. I just –we have to take care of her. We can’t let Monroe or anyone else— “

“She’s an alpha,” Deaton interject cautiously, “There is a lot to consider here.”

“No,” Liam replied firmly –he sounded so much surer than he felt. “ _I_ am the acting alpha. Clarke is a baby, _just_ a baby. We owe it –to her, to her pack, who fucking died to protect her—like, what kind of people would we be if we even had to think about this? I’m sorry, there’s nothing to consider. We just have to –adapt. She’s pack –it’s done.”

Deaton stared at him for a beat before a huge smile spread across his face.

“I’m guessing that was the right answer,” Liam whispered, ill because he couldn’t fucking handle this.

“Oh absolutely,” Deaton busied himself with dividing herbs into their proper jars. “You’re really growing into yourself, Liam. Scott would be proud.”  

Liam snorted weakly and lowered himself into a chair to text the group about the new developments.

(and thought of Theo. Always thought of Theo.)

Fuck.

❣

“Hey kid,” Liam whispered, running a finger along her cheek. “What did you do today?”

Clarke garbled up at him –wide eyes curious, gummy smile bright. Life was good, better than it had been in a while, but Clarke’s presence was a dazzling light that made it all the better. She brought a joy to their lives that Liam had never really experienced before.

It was only marred by the gaping hole that was—

Whatever.

“Yeah?” Liam laughed as Clarke babbled. His laugh made her more excited, flapping her hands about. “All that seriously happened while I was at school?”

He carefully took her out of her crib and gathered her into his arms.

(God fucking bless Melissa McCall for being an angel sent from the heavens. She allowed them to use the guest room in her house for Clarke’s crib and things –no judgment, no questions, just gave them a spare key and the days she’d be able to watch the baby.)

“I know you’re not really gonna get what I’m saying,” He rubbed circles onto her back as she babbled loudly, already a serious conversationalist. “But, uh, your pack isn’t around anymore. We’re gonna look for any –anyone that survived. But –just, I want you to know that we’re your pack. Until you don’t want us to be anymore.”

He stretched his neck a bit to look at her.

“Okay kiddo?” he whispered, hoarse. “We’ll take of you. I’ll take care of you.”

Clarke pressed her little hands to his face, grabbing and laughing.

And Liam was just gone. He was wrapped around her little fingers.

❣

 “She won’t stop crying,” Corey said, panic creeping into his voice. He sounded like he was close to tears himself. “Her eyes keep flashing, damn it, Liam. She swiped at Mason.”

Fuckfuck _fuck_ —

Liam had followed the faint scent left on the blanket Clarke had been wrapped in until he was deep, deep in the forests that surrounded Beacon Hills. He found the person, the woman, who’d brought baby Clarke to their doorstep.

She was dead, obviously, because fuck the universe.

Liana Alexander, according to the ID in her wallet. Dead at 28.

Liam exhaled roughly, stomach turning at the smell, the blood, the grief rolling through him at how fucking unfair the entire world was.  

“Fuck,” he could hear Clarke’s cries in the background, “fuck, Corey. I’m on my way, but I’m, like, an hour away. _Fuck_.”

Clarke’s cries got louder, like she heard and understood him.

 “Okay,” Corey sounded defeated. “Okay. I –we’ll be okay until you get here, it’s fine. It’s fine.”

It’s not. They’re way over their heads. It’s not fine. None of this is fine.

But it had to be, didn’t it?

Liam got down on his knees and smoothed Liana’s hair back off of her face.

“I am so sorry,” he whispered, “I’m so sorry you had to die like this, but I promise you, I swear on everything good, I will protect Clarke with my life.”  

They’d have to come back to bury her. She deserved that, but until then, Liam closed her unseeing eyes and—

Liam ran.

He ran and ran and ran and thought blankly of the “considerations” Deaton had so casually mentioned. Clarke was an alpha. In a moment of panic –not even panic, it didn’t even need to be panic, she’s a baby, a _baby_ for the sake of fuck, she was going to be cranky and uncomfortable and upset— she could hurt herself or Mason or fuck, fuckity, fuck.

Clarke was an alpha.  

Too long, too long of a time later he skidded to a halt outside of the McCall household. He crashed through the front door and paused long enough to check on Mason in the living room.

“I’m okay,” he mumbled. There were three light scratches on his left cheek. “Seriously, Liam. She barely got me, it’s not a big deal.”

Liam pressed a hard kiss to Mason’s forehead and rushed up the stairs into Clarke’s room, only to be greeted with an image that he hadn’t dared even imagine: Theo with baby Clarke pressed to his bare chest, quietly crooning soft lullabies as she sleepily blinked at him. She was fighting sleep with all her little might.

Liam gave himself a moment, a single moment, to take in the miles of bare skin before he sprung back into action.

“What,” Liam whispered hoarsely, still breathing hard. “the _fuck_.”

“Shut up Liam,” Theo replied. His voice was soft and smile brighter than Liam had ever seen before. “She’s about to fall asleep.”

She wasn’t, not anymore at least. At the sound of Liam’s voice, Clarke’s head had snapped towards him and her chubby little hands struggled to reach him, lowering lip trembling all over again.

“Gimme,” Liam maneuvered Clarke out of Theo’s arms. He was careful, ever so careful not to touch Theo’s bare skin. Still, its very proximity burned Liam like fire. “Again, Corey, what the fuck.”

Corey materialized behind him with a sheepish expression.

“She kept crying. Like –a lot. She couldn’t really breathe at one point because she was crying so hard. Just –She’s usually so good with you but you weren’t here and Mason was kind of freaking out and I was freaking out and then he showed up out of nowhere.” Corey swiped a hand over his tired face. “He got her to calm down almost immediately.”

“Corey,” Liam interrupted quietly, rocking Clarke the way Melissa had shown him. “It’s okay. It’s okay. I’m not mad.”

That was a lie –an ugly, bold faced lie. Liam knew it. Corey knew it. And Theo –smirking and still shirtless for fuck all reasons— especially knew it.

“I’m not mad at you,” Liam corrected himself. “I’m sorry I wasn’t around.”

“It’s okay, Liam. Did you find what you were looking for?”

“Yeah,” Liam looked down at Clarke, who was back to blinking sleepily, just on the brink of sleep. “I wish I hadn’t.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means we’re all she’s got.” Liam stroked a finger across her rosy cheek. “Is that okay with you?”

“Of course,” Corey replied, frowning. “That’s –that’s not even a question Liam, what the hell.”

Liam pressed his cheek against Clarke’s temple and breathed her comforting scent in.

“Yeah,” he answered. “Yeah, I know. I just didn’t wanna, you know, assume or whatever. What upset her?”

Mason made his way back into the room and put his arm around Corey.

“Dude,” Mason said, “not to be like, whatever, but I think you being so far away upset her.”

And, oh, wow. The warmth that bloomed in his chest was new and alarming.  

“She’s a born wolf,” Theo said. Liam’s eyes snapped back towards him, helpless, so fucking helpless. “who just turned into an alpha because her pack was murdered. Liam’s probably her anchor.”

“That,” Mason breathed, wide eyed. “That actually makes a lot of sense.”

Theo snorted quietly, and pulled on his shirt.

Mason and Corey quietly discussed the implications of an alpha child infant, but Liam couldn’t hear it. It had been a long, hard day and he still carried Liana’s scent on his skin and Theo, fucking Theo, hovered in his peripheral until Mason and Corey made their way out of the room and down the stairs.   

Liam felt so weird, so removed from his body, as he carefully set Clarke into her crib and tucked her blankie in around her.

“Liam—

“Not here.”

He didn’t, couldn’t, look at Theo as he made his way out of Clarke’s room, down the stairs, and out of the front door. He walked. He walked. He walked. He walked until they were shrouded in the darkness of the trees with only the crescent moon peeking down on them.

Theo quietly made his way after him.

Seeing Theo felt like a punch to the gut. It left Liam dazed and shaky –very nearly nauseous, weak in the knees in the ugliest way possible.

(He didn’t touch on the relief that spread through him. He didn’t touch on the sight of Theo in front of him –alive, alive, alive. It was easily the best thing he’d seen in years.)   

Theo tried again, “Liam.”

“Shut up,” Liam snapped, as anger and something, something else, surged and roared to life inside of him. “Shut _up_.”

Everything felt slow, slow, slow.

The light of moon. The sounds of distant traffic. The weight of the earth underneath Liam’s feet. The very sky itself felt like it was pressing down on him. The tight line of Theo’s jaw. The way Theo’s hands clenched and unclenched by his side. The unsteady _thrumthrumthrum_ of Theo’s heartbeat.

Theo. Theo. Theo.

Liam inhaled as deeply as he could.

“The sun,” He watched as the lines around Theo’s mouth softened. “The moon. The truth.”

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

(Theo’s scent filled his entire being, always a surprising citrus underneath the fresh, clean scent of soap. It was calming in all the worst ways –a telltale sign.)

“You good?” Theo questioned quietly.

“Fuck you,” Liam replied evenly. The anger –the hurt?— simmered just beneath the surface of his skin. It wasn’t gone, it was waiting.  

“Fair,” Theo smirked down at his hands. It was almost a rueful expression. “That’s fair.”

“Where were you?”

And _damn_ him. Damn Theo straight back to hell because Liam’s voice cracked audibly.  

“You know what,” Liam cut him off before Theo could begin to explain. “I don’t care. I don’t even fucking care. What do you want? Because that's why you’re here, isn’t it? You want something.”

Theo’s trademark smirk found its way back to his lips; Liam’s treacherous heart had given him away –at this point, he might as well gut himself open and lay it all out at Theo’s feet and pray that he’d be merciful.

“I went to see this pack on the east coast.”  

“I. Don’t. Care.”

Theo carefully stepped closer. Despite himself, despite every rational part of his being begging otherwise, Liam felt the tension in his shoulders give away at his proximity. He was still his anchor, still itched into his bones, still the reason his hands stopped shaking.   

But, he couldn’t let Theo know that, could he? 

(He couldn’t even admit it to himself.)

Liam shoved Theo backwards.  

“Where were you?” He asked again. “Huh, Theo? _Where the fuck were you_?”

There wasn’t –Liam wasn’t met with a smirk and a snide remark like he’d come to expect. That would make this whole thing so much easier, wouldn’t it?  Liam shoved him again, because he could, because he wasn’t fucking saying anything.

“You run again?” Liam hissed, ignoring, ignoring, ignoring the way his throat closed up, how hard it was to push the words through his lips. “Is that all you’re fucking good for?”

Theo watched him with an unreadable expression, slumped low against a tree.

“After everything,” and he was crying now, he knew it. Too far gone to even be embarrassed about it. “After _everything_ you just up and left and you didn’t even bother to call. To let me, fuck, _anyone_ know where you were or if you were even fucking _alive_ , you bastard. You selfish fucking bastard.”

“Did you want me to stick around?” Theo hissed, rushing back towards him quickly. “You wanted me to hang around until I snapped and killed someone? Because that’s what would have happened—

Liam scrubbed his face roughly, hands bumping Theo’s stomach on their way up. He’s so tired. Liam was so fucking tired. “Don’t you fucking dare—

“When’d you get so soft, Liam?” Theo whispered hoarsely, a finger quickly swiped away a stray tear on Liam’s face. “When did I stop being a killer?”

Everything’s slow.

slow, slow, slow.

Theo’s heartbeat is a shaky cadence in Liam’s ears.  

They’re shrouded in darkness –too close, closer than they’d been in that fucking elevator. Every bit of the righteous anger that had been simmering inside of him moments ago dissolved at the vulnerable –and it _was_ vulnerable, Jesus fucking Christ, it was gutted— look in Theo’s eyes.

“You’re not a killer,” he whispered, dropping his head to Theo’s shoulder. “Not anymore.”

Theo was stiff for a moment. He was just hard, unyielding muscle under Liam’s head until he slipped shaking hands around Liam’s waist.

“Why’d you leave?” Liam asked, hoarse.

Theo pressed his cheek against Liam’s hair, quiet.

“What if I hurt you?” he whispered, finally, finally. “What if I hurt Mason or Corey? What if everything that happened was just, just like, a fluke? I couldn’t risk that. I needed to learn how not to –not to hurt anyone again.”

_Scott will never trust you._

Liam carefully stepped out of the circle of Theo’s arms and, just, watched him. Watched the way his mouth wouldn’t cooperate enough to pull up into a smirk. He watched the way Theo tried to still the tremble in his hands.

“Did you?”Liam cleared his aching throat, “Did you learn?”

Theo shrugged, helpless, honest. “I don’t know.”

slow, slow, slow.  

Liam hummed, “You wanna stay with Clarke tonight? We take turns with her. Tonight’s my turn but I’m kind of, beat.” 

 _I trust you,_ he wanted to say. _I trust you with the most important thing in my life. I trust you. I trust you—_

Theo’s wide-eyed and slack jawed –it’s a good look on him, for a host of reasons that Liam really, really didn’t want to get into. Not then, not ever.

“Yeah,” he finally replied, voice cracking underneath the weight of what the offer meant. “Yeah, I wanna watch Clarke tonight.”

“Cool,” Liam smiled, and stopped himself from shoving his face back into Theo’s neck and crying. “Cool.”

Theo smiled faintly, heart still going haywire. “Dork.”

❣

Lydia’s pixilated face cooed at Clarke from Liam’s laptop screen.

“God, she is so cute.” she said, nose scrunching at Clarke’s grabby hands. “ _God,_ I can’t wait to come down.”  

College was a good look on Lydia. The longer she was away from Beacon Hills, the more the haunted look in her eyes dissipated. Liam knew that this life –gore, hurt, and everything in between— was one that Lydia accepted and embraced as a responsibility, but he selfishly wished he could hide her bleeding heart away from the rest of the world.

Because it would kill her one day.

Clarke made a bubbling noise –it was a new habit of hers that made Liam’s heart lurch happily. He laughed and pressed her to his bare chest, allowing her to scent him to her tiny alpha heart’s content.

(Theo’s idea.)

(Theo. Theo. Theo.)

“Liam,” Lydia said, carefully, after he’d been quiet for too long. “Honey, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine.” he grimaced at the way his voice cracked, “that’s was a terrible lie, wasn’t it?”

 Lydia tilted her head, a secret smile on her lips, “Just a little bit.”

Liam rubbed his cheek against Clarke’s head, “Do you want, like, full honesty? No BS?”

Lydia snorted, probably at his recent habit of not cursing in front of Clarke.

“It would make this whole process a bit easier, yes.” she replied patiently.

“I’m in love with Theo.”

Silence. Silence. Silence—

“Oh honey,” she said, almost mournfully. “Oh Liam.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I know.”

“This isn’t,” she sighed heavily, “Liam, this isn’t a bad thing. He’s changed –dramatically.”

“I know,” Liam replied, “I know. I just –Scott.”

This look, this far away look found its way to Lydia’s face.

“I wouldn’t worry about Scott,” she said, “If anyone was willing to forgive, it’s him. He’s forgiven worse from people that mean much more to him than Theo Raken.”

It was always startling to remember that the older members of the pack had years and years where Liam wasn’t around and that they’d suffered unnamable loss then too.

“What you need to worry about is how you’re going to tell Theo.”

“Yeah, no.” Liam laughed humorlessly, “No, I’m definitely not gonna do that.”

Lydia leaned into the screen, “Yes, you are. You’re going tell him because there is –there is this crazy chance that you can be happy with him, Liam. Don’t –with our lifestyle? We can’t afford to not try.”

“Lydia, come on. It’s not –okay, let’s for a moment forget, you know, the potential catastrophic repercussions, whatever, who’s to say that he feels the same way? I can’t,” he cleared his throat roughly, cradling Clarke closer to his chest. “I don’t think I can handle that. Not, not from him.”

“Oh baby,” Lydia whispered, “You’ve got to be smarter than that. I know you are.”

Liam squeezed his eyes shut. What’s that saying?

Penny in the air.

❣

They ran and ran and ran –free and wild and alive. They were so alive.

Theo ran alongside him as wolf, stunning and sleek and powerful –Liam was enamored at how beautiful he was in every form. He twisted around him, playfully nipping at his hands, pressing his nose to Liam’s stomach.

“Okay,” Liam laughed, threading his fingers through the thick fur around Theo’s face. Theo’s eyes looked back at him. “Alright, big guy, I think that’s enough for tonight.”

They made their way towards Theo’s home, Liam still laughing every time Theo did something funny for his entertainment. They had to sneak into the building quietly, despite the ridiculous giggles that continued to slip out of Liam’s mouth. When they finally made their way inside and closed the door behind them, Theo shifted, and Liam had to force himself to look away from the expanse of bronzed skin on display.

“You hungry?”

Liam snapped his head back towards Theo. He’d pulled on a pair of worn sweatpants and a loose tank top. There was still a frenzy-inducing amount of skin on display.  

“Uh,” Liam’s entire mouth was dry, “thirsty.”

Theo quirked a brow, smirking.

“I mean,” Liam resisted slapping himself across the face, “Yes, hungry. I’m hungry. Starving.”

Theo was still smirking as he fucking _strutted_ his way past Liam to get to the kitchen. But like, fuck. Fuck –how was he supposed to resist? How was he supposed to keep his hands to himself? Before he’d even realized what’d happened, Liam shoved Theo back into a wall and pressed his body against his –gasping like they were still running, running, running.

“I’m,” Liam dropped his face onto Theo’s shoulder, breathed in his scent until he was dizzy with it. “fuck. Fuck.”

 “What are you doing?” Theo whispered, hoarse.

“I wanna kiss you,” Liam replied, aching, honest. “Theo, I wanna kiss you so bad. Can I? Can I, please?”

He looked up at Theo’s shocked face, the plumpness of his lower lip, the curl of his hair against his forehead and—

“God,” Theo’s voice cracked, “yes, God. Yes.”

Liam surged forward and slotted his mouth against Theo’s, tasting –careful, careful, despite the fire under his skin.

“I’m not made of glass,” Theo said, even though he was breathing just as hard as Liam. Even though he was trembling under Liam’s wandering hands. Theo’s hands, his ridiculous fucking hands, wrapped around Liam’s back and pressed their bodies together roughly.

“Shut up,” Liam pressed back in, harder, let his tongue press just so against Theo’s lips, let his hands skim the expanse of Theo’s arms, the tight cords of his neck, just under his jaw. Theo groaned lowly when Liam sucked on his tongue, loud, loud, a punch of lust in Liam’s gut.

Theo’s hands were frantic across his back, pressing and scratching, wandering until they found their way to Liam’s ass, and just. Liam slotted his thigh between Theo and let him grind his cock down on him. He sucked marks onto the unblemished skin of Theo’s neck and bit at the delicate skin of his collar bones. Liam’s hand pressed underneath Theo’s flimsy fucking excuse for a shirt and pulled until Theo got the message and let go of Liam’s ass long enough for the shirt to fly across the room.

“Yours too,” Theo gasped as Liam’s mouth pressed biting kisses across his chest. Liam ignored him and lowered his head, tongue finding Theo’s hard nipple, biting, biting, sucking it into his mouth. Liam could come just from the filthy fucking sounds pouring out of Theo’s mouth, at how receptive his body was, jumping and jerking underneath Liam’s touch.

“Liam,” Theo groaned as Liam dropped to his knees, “What—?”

Liam nosed at Theo’s cock through his sweatpants, felt the hardness of it through the fabric. He felt like he was going to crawl out of his skin. “Please?” 

“Fuck,” Theo’s head thudded against the wall hard when Liam tugged his sweatpants down. His cock slapped up against his stomach, gorgeous and already leaking. “Fuck, of course you’d be polite now. Fuck.”

Liam had never done this before, but god, god. He wanted. He wanted so badly. Experimentally, he wrapped his hand around Theo and started jacking him the way he liked to do to himself –squeezing harder when Theo moaned low at that, going faster just to see the rapid rise and fall of Theo’s chest above him. There was a pearl gathering at his slit and Liam couldn’t help himself, didn’t want to, when he leaned forward and licked it off with a broad swipe of tongue.

Theo’s hand slapped the wall loudly. 

He ran his tongue along Theo’s cock from root to tip, before sucking on the tip, just to see what would happen. Theo jerked forward, slipping further into Liam’s mouth, and fuck, Liam grabbed Theo’s hands and pressed them to his head –because he liked that, liked the feel of Theo fucking into his mouth.

“Liam,” Theo warned lowly, threading his fingers into Liam’s hair. Liam took no head to the warning and lowered further down Theo’s cock, taking all that he could into his mouth, wrapping his hands around the rest. He closed his watering eyes, and started bobbing his head, loving the velvet slide of Theo’s cock against his tongue, the salty tang of him filling his mouth. He reached forward and cupped Theo’s balls into his hand, before ducking down to suck them into his mouth, because he wanted, he wanted, he wanted.

“Liam,” Theo gasped again, voice shaking and desperate. “Liam, I’m gonna—

Liam moved faster, faster, faster, watching the way his hand slid up and down Theo’s slick cock until Theo groaned low and painted himself all over Liam’s mouth and chest.

“Fuck,” Theo gasped, sliding down to the ground. “Fucking shit, come ‘ere. Liam, come _here_.”

Liam felt like he was moving through honey when he climbed into Theo’s lap.

“Come here,” Theo murmured again, cleaning Liam’s face with tongue. Licking against his mouth and chin. “You’re –you’re amazing. Unbelievable. Look at you –gorgeous.”

Liam groaned low at Theo’s words, the low thrum of his voice, and pressed frenzied kisses onto his mouth, tasting Theo’s come on his lips.

“Fuck,” Theo unbuttoned Liam’s pants and slid his hands around Liam’s cock, he started jacking him leisurely, Liam gasping into his mouth, his fingers threaded roughly into Theo’s hair. “Does that turn you on, Liam? Me telling you how amazing you are? How gorgeous you look covered in my come?”

And that’s it, that’s all it took. Theo’s hand wrapped around his cock, filthy words pouring out of his mouth, and Liam was spilling all over his hand. He pressed his face into the crook of Theo’s neck and bit down, groaning low.

“There you go,” Theo whispered, “look at you.”  

Somehow, after they’d both recovered, they made their way into Theo’s bed and wrapped tightly around one another. Before he could talk himself out of it, Liam brought himself up to an elbow and looked down at Theo, “I should’ve said this, earlier, before, you know.”

Theo’s content expression quickly shuttered.

“Don’t,” Liam frowned, letting his hand draw absent patterns along Theo’s stomach, watching his muscles jump and jerk. So fucking receptive. “Don’t make that face –it’s nothing bad, I hope. I don’t think it’s bad.”

Theo watched him, uncharacteristically quiet, waiting.  

 _Just tell him_ , Lydia’s voice said. _You deserve happiness. You both do._

“I’m in love with you.”

Theo’s mouth opened and closed enough times that Liam was tempted to kiss him again but now wasn’t the time.  

“I don’t,” Liam went on quietly, “I don’t expect you to feel the same –I just, this isn’t a one time thing for me, you know? I just, I just thought you should know that.”

“You’re in love with me,” Theo repeated, “You’re in love with _me_ ,”

 _Be kind_ , Lydia had said. _Remember his past._

A crooked smile found its way to Liam’s lips, “Yeah, Theo. I’m in love with you.”  

“This isn’t,” Theo started, shock still evident on his face. “Is this a joke? Are you messing with me?”

Liam leaned forward, slowly, slowly, slowly, giving Theo all the time in the world to stop him. He kissed him sweetly, so sweetly. Liam poured every bit of what he felt, how proud he was of Theo, every bit of those too-big-feelings into the sacred velvet slid of his tongue against Theo’s.

“No, Theo.” Liam finally pulled away, mouth slick. There were tears gathered around Theo’s eyes. “I’m not messing with you.”  

Theo couldn’t speak. Liam didn’t expect him to, but he did pull him into his arms and rub comforting circles into his back until they both asleep.

It’s okay. This, Liam could deal with.

He’d show him he loved him every day for the rest of their life.

❣

A tiny hand grabbed his face, startling him awake.

“Good morning,” Clarke said happily, “It’s Sunday!”

She lisped sweetly around her S’s, making Liam smile widely despite the way sleep clung to him.

“Clarke,” a voice whispered, Theo rushed into the room. “Baby, no, come on. We said we’d let Liam sleep in.”

“But it’s Sunday,” she replied sullenly, “it’s _pancake_ day. Liam _has_ to get up.”

 “It’s okay,” Liam sat up slightly, and pulled Clarke into his lap to press kisses all over her giggling face. Theo watched, smiling widely, from the doorway until Liam gestured him forward and pulled him into the bed too.

Clarke snuggled between them, content.

“I guess we could go back to sleep,“ she said reasonably, pressing her face into Theo’s chest. Theo wore that expression that he always did when confronted with the sheer amount of blessings in his life –shocked and scared, like he might wake up and it would all turn to dust around him.

“’Morning,” Liam leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the corner of Theo’s mouth. He reached forward over Clarke’s drowsy form and scratched through the scruff on Theo’s face. “Thank you for trying to let me sleep in.”

Theo looked at him, so fond, so beautiful it still took Liam’s breath away. “How’d it go last night?”

It wasn’t always good—

There wasn’t always peace, not outside and not in their home. It wasn’t always giggling and Sunday pancakes and sleeping in. Some days, it was nightmares and gasping and constant, never ending forgiveness. Sometimes, it was baby Clarke, five years old now, losing control in her anger and hurt and the trauma she carried despite their best efforts. Sometimes, it was hunters who still didn’t believe in their right to live.  

Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes—

But usually, it was this. It was Liam being so in love with Theo that he thought it would suffocate him and Theo looking back him like he hung the moon and the stars.

“It was good,” Liam replied, sleep pulling him back under. “It was really good.”

Usually, it was good. It was so good.

/end.  

 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!!! <3


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